An Insight (part three) [click for part 2]

"We desire nothing so much as what we ought not to have."

Publilius Syrus
(~100 BC)
…………………………………………………………………………………………………

A CONTINUATION:
…………………………..

We walk out of sight
We ‘hide’
He tells me his name is FAZ
I tell him my name
He gives me his number
I tell him I might not call
He tells me to keep it incase I change my mind..


We part
I don’t call
I don’t see him again
I go back to Saudi
I have to go to school!
…………………………………..

IN NEED FOR MY FRIENDS:
……………………………………….
I tell them he is cold.
They tell me our story is just..
Too old!
But I love him..
They say it is not true..
The say he is a custom
I have become used to..

I disagree
I will not give up..
On love..
I will not give up..
On ‘D’


My friends and I go out for ‘coffee’
(In Riyadh this means, we go to a coffee shop on Tahleya street, wait in the car.. while the waiter brings our orders to us.. then we drive around)

‘Coffee Time’ it is!
……………………………..

A TIME OF COINCIDENCE:
…………………………….

As is the custom in Riyadh.. boys’ cars wait by girls’ cars,, and they stare at each other..
If there is a ‘click’ (I’m still not sure what these clicks r based on in Saudi)
He may hold up his number
She stores it on her phone
They have a ‘phone relationship’.

Now these types of relationships are what me and ‘D’ always laughed about..
We knew a couple who had been ‘together’ for a whole year before they even knew what their partners looked like..
‘D’ thought that was absurd..
I agreed..
At the time!
………………..

We check out the boys
They check us out too!

‘Y does that guy have a stick up his ass?’ asks my friend
‘What guy?’ I say
‘The one in the black car’ she says

I look over..
THE NOSE!

I scream,
I jump,
I explain to my friend..

FAZ simply looks over and disappears
I’m disappointed

Maybe he didn’t recognize me…
Maybe he just didn’t care!

I part with my friends..
I’m on my way home..
I’m being WATCHED!
I look over, its him..
He is ‘following my car’!!!!

I get home, he leaves..
That’s it!

Eventually, this became a daily routine,,
He follows my car everyday from school..
But.. NOTHING..
…………………..
FEELING LONELY:
……………………….

‘D’ is always busy.
When he’s not
He is not in the mood
I tried
Lord knows I tried
He won’t change
I can’t change him..

I look for FAZ’s number desperately..
I can’t find it!
DAMN IT!!!!
…………….

The next day
He follows my car again
I pluck the courage to ask him
(Using sign language of course)
‘o ba3deen?’ (Now what?)
He laughs..
He looks down and scribbles
He holds up a piece of paper
With his number on it!

‘Am I going to become one of THOSE girls?
How else am I going to talk to him?
Maybe I shouldn’t talk to him!
But ‘D’ is being a complete JERK!’

I decide.
Tonight, I will call!
……………………

beeep.... beeeeep… beeeep..
bee…… ‘ALOO’
ok not the type of voice I was expecting!
But what the hell..
Just because he LOOKS manly
Doesn’t mean he has to SOUND manly

Me: ‘Aloo’
Him: ‘a5eeeeran!’ (Finally!)

We speak for a while..
He doesn’t really speak any English
He’s 4 years older than ‘D’
He comes from a very conservative family
He is NEW..
Not ‘D’
Not like me..
Just different..
……………………..

QUICK OVERVIEW (the next 3 years):
………………………………………….

FAZ is a friend
FAZ is a boyfriend
FAZ is a brother
FAZ is a best-friend
FAZ knows about ‘D’
‘D’ does not know about FAZ

Perdu and ‘D’ fight
Perdu calls FAZ
‘D’ says he’s sorry
Perdu tells FAZ she’s sorry
But they can not talk anymore
(the above takes place at least 5 times a year)

Perdu fights with ‘D’
FAZ is ALWAYS there!
………………………….

A few notes:

*FAZ is not an angel
*’D’ was very young at the time
*Perdu …. Very confused!
*FAZ thinks Perdu is an angel.. (he did then at least)
*Perdu thinks FAZ is an angel.. (I did then at least)
*Perdu lives a double life: .the perfect little conservative Saudi girl with FAZ.
.just herself with ‘D’.
*’D’ is in the dark!
……………………………………………

COMING UP:
*’D’ finds out
*FAZ disappears
*Life is great!
*Perdu complicates EVERYTHING.. once again..
stay tuned..
…………………………………………….

TO BE CONTINUED!